The coordination factor wasn't at the top of it's game with my first born! All 3 kids were required to wait until they were closer to the age of 17 before arranging the test... however with Jamison, I really struggled.
I don't know if it was my concern more because it my first time having a child become a driver or the fact that this boy was a klutz!
The boy was fabulously athletic. Excellent team member for baseball..1st baseman and a great basketball player. He made almost all of his shots and was excellent on defense!
He couldn't pour a class of milk with out spilling!... not just a drop--> but over the top, puddles on the counter spilling. It was comical actually. Never failed to happen! he kept growing so fast that I just don't think he was fully aware of his whole self!
I allowed him to get a permit when he was close to 17 and after the required 6 months he finally felt he was ready to take the test. The parallel parking got him.. He didn't pass until his next test about 2 weeks later.
It wasn't until he was driving for a month that he had his first fender bender.
Oh the joys of those calls at night after you think everyone is safe where they should be......
All three had similar first tests and minor fender bender car accidents not long after they were driving. I hoped it helped them to be safer drivers. Jamison was involved in an accident when he was 23 where he hurt his knee pretty badly, but that's another story!
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Friday, October 16, 2009
Sweet Little Old Men .. gave Inspiration for Breastfeeding in Public
My first baby was born in sunny Florida during a particularly hot stretch in May 1979. Although I was an OB nurse, I knew very little about breastfeeding other than what my older co-workers had taught me—which was not all that correct or very helpful information. Luckily, I had a great friend who was nursing her 3 month old at the time my son was born. She really showed me the ropes. It just so happened that she was the one who took me home from the hospital. We had to stop at the store for a few items so we went in to a “Publix” supermarket with both babies in our arms. My newborn son began fussing to nurse soon after we hit the air conditioning.
I said.. “I’m going to have to go back out to the car and nurse him.”
My friend says “Oh..You’ll do no such thing.. You’ll die in that heat.. Just hook him up and keep shopping so we can get finished and out of here!”
Me- “Nurse him in here?”
Friend- “Well if he’s hungry.. yeah!.. (after looking at my face) Oh stop worrying about it..go over to a deserted aisle, get him hooked on and put your receiving blanket up near his face… nobody will know!”
Me- timidly…above the louder howls.. “Alright, be right back..”
I found the most private place I could. I started cursing that complicated “wonderful nursing bra” I just had to have. (Remember..this is 30 years ago... this bra is now an antique!) My skills handling newborns allowed me some grace as I attempted to multitask by stooping down, prop my loudly crying baby on my partial lap, use 2 hands to fiddle with the damn nursing bra, then get him back up near my finally free boob and latched on.
Ahhhh~ quiet, happy, drinking baby!
Still stooped down, I peered slowly behind me -- expecting that a large crowd must have assembled. Somewhat surprisingly, everybody was just going about their business and I happily realized that noone was looking at me! I stood up, made sure I wasn’t showing anything, and walked off with my happily nursing baby to find my friend.
It’s amazing how many people want to see a quiet baby as opposed to a screaming infant!
A sweet little old man stopped me first and asked me how old my baby was….”3 days”, I replied. He peeked in for a closer look and he actually didn’t get it right away.. “I can’t really see his face.”.. I said “Well- he’s feeding right now.”.. He just said..”OOPS….sorry about that! Well he’s a cute one!” then walked off.
The next person who stopped me was again.. a sweet little old man. He was very smiley and jolly. He asked all about the baby but didn’t lean over to look like the other man. I quickly said he’s nursing now and then answered all the small talk. He never seemed uncomfortable about it at all! That probably gave me a lot more confidence. We parted ways and I finally found my friend. She gave me an approving thumbs up, asked me to hold a basket with my other hand and said we were almost done.
Another little old man stopped us by the register to ask about both babies. We gave him all the small talk answers and let him know my son was nursing. This guy was a real sweetie, commenting on how lucky kids were that moms were starting to “nurse their young” again and ‘good for you.” He never tried to look in at my son. He didn’t seem embarrassed by the process at all. He was the coolest guy!
I left the Publix Supermarket on my way home to begin my life as a mommy…. with a little public education bonus. Encountering those sweet little old men while feeding my baby and receiving their positive type feedback was the gentle support I needed. I went on to feel empowered to nurse in public for all three of my babies… Those little old men were just so supportive! ~ When my baby was hungry, he needed to feed and it really didn’t matter where I was at the time. Thank goodness for my friend’s wisdom and support to go for it!
I became a lactation professional while nursing my last baby. It was then, only after I really became more aware of issues surrounding nursing in public that I actually took any kind of public action to empower other moms. I’ve done lots of different little things as the years have gone by. I want to mention one fun way that I thought I could help gently re-educate some of the "new" sweet little old men of this day and age. Our local paper has a lot of little retired guys commenting back and forth on various local articles. I’m guessing their age and status by all the things they say. I took this opportunity to possibly educate some of these forum readers about breastfeeding rights in public. Every once in a while, on the forum, I put out a little snippet on nursing in public… and sit back and watch what they have to say in reply! It's quite fun!
I said.. “I’m going to have to go back out to the car and nurse him.”
My friend says “Oh..You’ll do no such thing.. You’ll die in that heat.. Just hook him up and keep shopping so we can get finished and out of here!”
Me- “Nurse him in here?”
Friend- “Well if he’s hungry.. yeah!.. (after looking at my face) Oh stop worrying about it..go over to a deserted aisle, get him hooked on and put your receiving blanket up near his face… nobody will know!”
Me- timidly…above the louder howls.. “Alright, be right back..”
I found the most private place I could. I started cursing that complicated “wonderful nursing bra” I just had to have. (Remember..this is 30 years ago... this bra is now an antique!) My skills handling newborns allowed me some grace as I attempted to multitask by stooping down, prop my loudly crying baby on my partial lap, use 2 hands to fiddle with the damn nursing bra, then get him back up near my finally free boob and latched on.
Ahhhh~ quiet, happy, drinking baby!
Still stooped down, I peered slowly behind me -- expecting that a large crowd must have assembled. Somewhat surprisingly, everybody was just going about their business and I happily realized that noone was looking at me! I stood up, made sure I wasn’t showing anything, and walked off with my happily nursing baby to find my friend.
It’s amazing how many people want to see a quiet baby as opposed to a screaming infant!
A sweet little old man stopped me first and asked me how old my baby was….”3 days”, I replied. He peeked in for a closer look and he actually didn’t get it right away.. “I can’t really see his face.”.. I said “Well- he’s feeding right now.”.. He just said..”OOPS….sorry about that! Well he’s a cute one!” then walked off.
The next person who stopped me was again.. a sweet little old man. He was very smiley and jolly. He asked all about the baby but didn’t lean over to look like the other man. I quickly said he’s nursing now and then answered all the small talk. He never seemed uncomfortable about it at all! That probably gave me a lot more confidence. We parted ways and I finally found my friend. She gave me an approving thumbs up, asked me to hold a basket with my other hand and said we were almost done.
Another little old man stopped us by the register to ask about both babies. We gave him all the small talk answers and let him know my son was nursing. This guy was a real sweetie, commenting on how lucky kids were that moms were starting to “nurse their young” again and ‘good for you.” He never tried to look in at my son. He didn’t seem embarrassed by the process at all. He was the coolest guy!
I left the Publix Supermarket on my way home to begin my life as a mommy…. with a little public education bonus. Encountering those sweet little old men while feeding my baby and receiving their positive type feedback was the gentle support I needed. I went on to feel empowered to nurse in public for all three of my babies… Those little old men were just so supportive! ~ When my baby was hungry, he needed to feed and it really didn’t matter where I was at the time. Thank goodness for my friend’s wisdom and support to go for it!
I became a lactation professional while nursing my last baby. It was then, only after I really became more aware of issues surrounding nursing in public that I actually took any kind of public action to empower other moms. I’ve done lots of different little things as the years have gone by. I want to mention one fun way that I thought I could help gently re-educate some of the "new" sweet little old men of this day and age. Our local paper has a lot of little retired guys commenting back and forth on various local articles. I’m guessing their age and status by all the things they say. I took this opportunity to possibly educate some of these forum readers about breastfeeding rights in public. Every once in a while, on the forum, I put out a little snippet on nursing in public… and sit back and watch what they have to say in reply! It's quite fun!
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Medical Science vs Natural Childbirth
I sat here to write the story of our first planned VBAC and realized as I scanned my other posts that I had to tell just a little more history to help explain the attitudes of the times.
During the mid 70's early 80's... our country was changing in many ways. In the medical world, Obstetrical medicine was becoming more specialized with the development of many subspecialties including "Perinatology" and "Neonatology". Perinatology by definition is the study of the unborn fetus and recently born infant during the first several weeks of life. It was the changing concern of obstetricians from a sole focus on the mother's health to one which is balanced between the mother's health and the unborn or newborn. ACOG started to offer a specialty certification exam for perinatology in 1974, and in 1977, the Society of Perinatal Obstetricians (now called the Society for Maternal-Fetal Medicine) was formed. The term used to describe a Perinatologist today is a Maternal-Fetal Medicine Specialist. This specialty is the management of high-risk pregnancies and the assessment and treatment of the fetus. Neonatology (established 1975 by the AAP) is the study of a highly specialized care of the newly born infant especially the ill or premature newborn infant usually hospital based in NICU's.
Young women were becoming more and more interested in a natural approach to childbirth. People all over the country were driving maternity services to offer the availability of birth options for these moms. The ICEA [International Childbirth Education Association] came to our town in the late 70's and a local chapter was born. “Freedom of choice based on knowledge of alternatives” in childbirth was a motto on their pamphlet information. There were some individuals in the community going for the new certification of childbirth educators. They were educating some new mom's about birth options...... that we, the staff hadn't learned about let alone developed as an option for our patients. Many on the staff scorned this movement. It seemed to me that these changes were all happening at the same time. We were learning about advances in observing and monitoring the well-being of both the laboring mother and her unborn fetus, preventing complications etc.... arising from the research studies done from the emerging sub-specialties. We had one fetal monitor and purchased another. As soon as the specialists found that continuous fetal monitoring was advantageous to picking up potential problems in advance, to possibly avoid or prepare for complications, there was a natural childbirth revolt against the constant recumbent positioning that EFM (electronic fetal monitoring) seemed to require. There were more examples as with IV fluids or access and other routine procedures. The nurses didn't understand. They were just trying to do what science and our doctors were telling them...[though not always willingly as some were afraid of the newer technology.] To them, this group pushing a natural childbirth movement was the same population that had just wanted to be given drugs, put to sleep and "wake me when it's over" crowd.
I realize that although these advances in science and the movement of young people seeking natural childbirth options seemed to happen so close to the same time in my world, it probably didn't happen this way for all of the country. Here, I really think it probably greatly contributed to the attitudes of nurses and doctors I worked with at the time. Those professionals who just couldn't relinquish control. They were learning more about the science of birth, of monitoring and couldn't quite allow or see how the "natural" component could fit in. Those individuals often were guilty of the abuse of professional power, the use of misinformation and the blindness and arrogance to maintain control of the birth process... taking it away from the mother. Those professionals who should have known better. They did not know of the rights of childbearing Women, or of general patient rights for that matter. Unfortunately-- there are some who still have these control issues.
That's another story....
During the mid 70's early 80's... our country was changing in many ways. In the medical world, Obstetrical medicine was becoming more specialized with the development of many subspecialties including "Perinatology" and "Neonatology". Perinatology by definition is the study of the unborn fetus and recently born infant during the first several weeks of life. It was the changing concern of obstetricians from a sole focus on the mother's health to one which is balanced between the mother's health and the unborn or newborn. ACOG started to offer a specialty certification exam for perinatology in 1974, and in 1977, the Society of Perinatal Obstetricians (now called the Society for Maternal-Fetal Medicine) was formed. The term used to describe a Perinatologist today is a Maternal-Fetal Medicine Specialist. This specialty is the management of high-risk pregnancies and the assessment and treatment of the fetus. Neonatology (established 1975 by the AAP) is the study of a highly specialized care of the newly born infant especially the ill or premature newborn infant usually hospital based in NICU's.
Young women were becoming more and more interested in a natural approach to childbirth. People all over the country were driving maternity services to offer the availability of birth options for these moms. The ICEA [International Childbirth Education Association] came to our town in the late 70's and a local chapter was born. “Freedom of choice based on knowledge of alternatives” in childbirth was a motto on their pamphlet information. There were some individuals in the community going for the new certification of childbirth educators. They were educating some new mom's about birth options...... that we, the staff hadn't learned about let alone developed as an option for our patients. Many on the staff scorned this movement. It seemed to me that these changes were all happening at the same time. We were learning about advances in observing and monitoring the well-being of both the laboring mother and her unborn fetus, preventing complications etc.... arising from the research studies done from the emerging sub-specialties. We had one fetal monitor and purchased another. As soon as the specialists found that continuous fetal monitoring was advantageous to picking up potential problems in advance, to possibly avoid or prepare for complications, there was a natural childbirth revolt against the constant recumbent positioning that EFM (electronic fetal monitoring) seemed to require. There were more examples as with IV fluids or access and other routine procedures. The nurses didn't understand. They were just trying to do what science and our doctors were telling them...[though not always willingly as some were afraid of the newer technology.] To them, this group pushing a natural childbirth movement was the same population that had just wanted to be given drugs, put to sleep and "wake me when it's over" crowd.
I realize that although these advances in science and the movement of young people seeking natural childbirth options seemed to happen so close to the same time in my world, it probably didn't happen this way for all of the country. Here, I really think it probably greatly contributed to the attitudes of nurses and doctors I worked with at the time. Those professionals who just couldn't relinquish control. They were learning more about the science of birth, of monitoring and couldn't quite allow or see how the "natural" component could fit in. Those individuals often were guilty of the abuse of professional power, the use of misinformation and the blindness and arrogance to maintain control of the birth process... taking it away from the mother. Those professionals who should have known better. They did not know of the rights of childbearing Women, or of general patient rights for that matter. Unfortunately-- there are some who still have these control issues.
That's another story....
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